35. Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn and Fib: How to Stay Grounded during Conflict

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In this episode, we uncover the hidden mechanisms behind stress responses, with insights from Dr. Jeff and Tony Overbay. You’ll gain a deeper understanding of how your brain’s fight, flight, freeze, and fawn reactions could be influencing your daily interactions without you even realizing it. Tony introduces the concept of the “fib” response, showing how people sometimes turn to lying as an avoidance mechanism in tense situations. Through personal anecdotes, we explore how these instinctive reactions show up in both business meetings and our closest relationships.
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We dive into Laura’s question about navigating arguments where she freezes while her partner becomes more aggressive. She asks, “How can we meet in the middle?”
We also discuss how prolonged stress can take a toll on your body and mind by raising adrenaline and cortisol levels. Dr. Jeff explains how these hormones prepare you for immediate danger but can lead to cognitive decline and increased body fat when stress becomes chronic. Meanwhile, Tony shares stories from his work with couples, illustrating how quickly stress can hijack rational thought and communication. Trisha offers practical strategies for calming your critter brain and keeping your prefrontal cortex online, so your conversations aren’t derailed by stress-driven impulsivity.
Mindfulness isn’t just a buzzword; it’s a critical tool for managing emotional responses. Trisha provides actionable tactics like grounding exercises, breathing techniques, self-reflection, and verbalizing your need for space—oh, and don’t forget chocolate! Tony also shares stories on setting boundaries.
This episode is packed with tips for creating healthier relationships and improving emotional well-being through thoughtful preparation and mindful awareness. Join us to equip yourself with the tools to handle stress like a pro and foster more meaningful connections with those around you.

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1. 35. Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn and Fib: How to Stay Grounded during Conflict (00:00:00)

2. Nervous System Responses in Stress (00:00:08)

3. Long-Term Impacts of Stress Responses (00:12:51)

4. Regulating Fight Response Through Mindfulness (00:18:45)

5. Managing Stress Responses for Better Communication (00:30:21)

6. Regulating FON Stress Response in Relationships (00:38:23)