Episode 157: Projecting Onto Others What Is Unowned About Me

Sean Healy: Tools

How understanding our judgments can create greater self-awareness

What am I drawn to in others that grabs my attention in either positive or negative ways?

Is what I am attracted to or repelled by in others actually an opportunity to acknowledge an aspect in myself. Through the process of growing up we may find that elements of our being have been under-expressed or not permitted due to the family system we grew up in.

For example, I may find that I am drawn to and have a fascination with carefree, go with the flow people. Part of the fascination is a calling to acknowledge and allow myself to embrace my fun free, hedonistic self more fully than I have been doing. However, I may have grown up in a family system that overtly or covertly sent the message that hard work and seriousness were what was acceptable and valued by the family. Fun and enjoying life is trivial rather than of vital importance to developing the wholeness of self.

On the flip side, if I find myself disapproving of the behaviour of another, I can ask myself ‘where am I doing the same thing in my life?’ You spot it, you got it type approach.

This episode is about viewing others as an opportunity to turn the lens back on self so as to embrace and integrate a more complete self.