115: The Difference Between Bullying and Ordinary Meanness (and why it matters) with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore

Struggle Care

Today’s episode covers the topics of bullying, meanness, and conflict. My guest is uniquely qualified to share her wisdom and expertise, which she did in a TEDx talk. Bullying or meanness: what’s the difference, and how do we recognize the two? Join us to learn more!

Show Highlights:

● Dr. Eileen’s background as a clinical psychologist and author

● The specific criteria in the definition of bullying

● Empowering our kids to withstand meanness without taking a victim stance: “Conflict is inevitable.”

● Bullying has become “a thought-stopping cliche.”

● Meanness and bullying in the online world

● Vulnerability in being a content creator and dealing with feedback

● A better approach with kids: “Whose opinion matters to you?”

● The truth about self-esteem and a “quiet ego”

● Connecting with something greater than ourselves

● Helping kids learn self-compassion rather than self-esteem (Dr. Eileen teaches a “reflect, but downshift” technique in her book, Kid Confidence.)

● Dr. Eileen’s formula for teaching reflection to kids

● “Whose feelings are most important?”

● Validating and normalizing kids’ feelings (by following their lead) by offering empathy and confidence

● Being your kids “biased biographer”

● Learning to “stay in the water” instead of standing on the edge of the pool ● “Testing the water” to pull back on accommodations

Resources and Links:

Connect with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore: Website (Find books for parents and kids!) and Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic podcast,

Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook

Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning

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