S24E9: The Harmful Effects of Being the Good Girl

Cultivating H.E.R. Space: Uplifting Conversations for the Black Woman

Lady! Have you ever been called the good girl? Are you perceived as dependable, reliable, and relatively harmless? Do people expect perfection from you and when you fall short from those expectations do, they make you feel shame and guilt? And, what happens to your good girl image once you decide to stick up for yourself or say no? Is the backlash swift and painful? If anything mentioned sounds familiar, then this week’s episode is for you.
Terri and Dr. Dom share their experiences with being the good girl and why those perceptions and thereby responsibilities can be harmful as we mature into adulthood. Whether you are the oldest child, or you came from a strict family, or you had to figure out your upbringing on your own; we’ve all experienced the societal burden of being the good girl. The good news is now that we’re grown women we have the power of choice and can choose to untangle the deleterious programming we’ve been surrounded by through family, media, and society.
Dr. Dom and Terri outline some of the harmful effects of the good girl mindset this episode. Don’t be surprised if some of the impacts are so subversive that they touch a tender spot in you. But, you know how we do. Check into the Aftershow for tips on how to heal and improve your life now that you know that you can be amazing, badass, and awesome without the low mantle of being good.
Lady, this internal work can tough but it is necessary for growth and self-actualization. Check out our Cultivating H.E.R. Space shop for journals, pillows, latte mugs, and apparel to ease some of the awakenings you’re having while listening. They also make for great gifts this holiday season!

Quote of the Day:
"Being unapologetic means that I will be all of me. I will no longer shrink or compromise myself by playing small so others will not feel insecure in my presence.”
– Lisa Nichols
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary

Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC

Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
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Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com