Navigating Difficult Conversations and Big Emotions to Establish Calm on Your Autism Journey

Thriving Moms of Autistics

Welcome back to another episode of the Thriving Moms of Autistics Podcast. Navigating emotions can be really hard. Have you ever been in a situation where your emotions were so strong that they hijacked the situation?

Everyone has experienced this. You are not alone. This is why I encourage you often to show yourself some grace.

In this episode, we dive into the neurodivergent experience of emotion and how to navigate our emotions when others are impeding on our autism journey negatively and when we are dealing with big stuff along the way.

Find the full transcript for this episode on your favorite podcast app.

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Why Is It Critical for Autism Moms to Navigate Big Emotions?

All human beings experience emotions. Emotions drive our behavior. That is why it is so important to regulate emotions.

You might feel that you cannot regulate them because your world is so chaotic, but you actually can. In fact, you will find that the chaos will lesson when you do regulate your emotions. Now that is going to take some practice.

For moms of autistics, so much feels out of your control. One of the few things you can control is your emotions.

Big emotions are necessary and normal. They have their place. Remember, we all experience them. To gain more control, you must identify and understand them.

Also, you must experience them rather than pushing them down and avoiding them. You can experience big emotions and still regulate them appropriately.

You must experience the hard stuff for growth to occur. The emotion is what it is, but it is what you do with the emotion that changes everything. Regulating that emotion changes the behavior and the outcome.

Have you ever heard, “Well, they made me mad,” and someone replied to them, “No, you chose to be mad?”

That is not entirely true. Emotions are an experience.Our choice lies in hanging onto the emotion.

How Do Moms Deal with Difficult People Effectively So They Don’t Negatively Impact Their Autism Journey

Some people cannot be avoided. They are in your life in some capacity, such as work or family, and you have to deal with them. Now, that doesn’t mean that you are going to sit around braiding each other’s hair.

I had a situation recently where I had one of these encounters. This person asked me for the millionth time why we cannot do certain things because we parent our child differently to keep them safe.

Doesn’t that get old? It is one of those things where they think if they ask enough times, we will just give in and do it their way at the expense of our child and family.

I graciously explained again, but there will come a day where I will simply say, “I have explained this several times. It hasn’t changed nor will it. You can choose to accept it or not.

It is okay to say that. I know we will have to do that at some point. And I have accepted it.

I know that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and that’s fine. I still do what I can to respond rationally and respectfully while setting firm boundaries.

You might think that this person deserves to be laid into, especially when they try to have conversations in front of your child. I know that is not helpful and no good can come of it. It will only lead to an escalation or more problems.

I don’t mesh well with this person and have to set boundaries often. We have different values and different personalities. They attack me verbally and get others