Matthew Del Negro: Redefining Rejection - Finding Resilience Through Reframing

Quit Happens | How (and why!) to strategically quit your job, leave your relationship, or part ways with toxic mindsets.

There’s a beauty in taking a failure, rejection, no, or quit and turning it into something good. It starts with reshaping our minds to see these as opportunities instead. Matthew del Negro has made his life out of accepting no’s with grace.

Matthew is an actor and host of the 10,000 No’s podcast. Being an actor, he’s faced many rejections in his life from auditions and pilot episodes, rarely getting callbacks. It’s just the life of an actor! But he’s looking at the positive side of these no’s and has decided to celebrate them for what they are: opportunities in disguise.

Now that we’ve established that facing rejection is a chance for the Universe to bring something else to your attention, it’s important to remember that those people you think of as an overnight success are really not. They’ve all gone through the rejection process and have come out on top. But just because you’ve succeeded once, doesn’t mean you will every time - the struggle doesn’t stop just because you’re at the top, it just changes.

But Matthew says that just because you accept these no’s or the quits you decide to do, you might still feel a sense of loss and disappointment. It’s okay to feel these, but it’s not okay to wallow in those feelings. Overall, Matthew shares that you need to listen to what your heart wants because it’s rarely going to steer you wrong.

One way to help reframe your feelings of rejection is to look at life as one giant audition. Matthew explains how each audition that didn’t end in an acting gig was building who he was, helping his reputation, and taking him closer to the big break. The Universe has its own path for you, you just have to trust it.

Have you faced a no in your life before? How do you deal with rejection? When is the last time you put your trust in the Universe? Let us know in the comments on the episode page!

In This Episode:

• Why “overnight successes” are anything but
• Why you need to understand that the struggle doesn’t just stop when you have one success
• What emotions you can experience even when you’re sure you want to quit something
• Why you should listen to what your heart wants
• Why you should treat your entire life as an audition
• How you can trust that the Universe has its own path for you
• How you can reframe your idea of failure

Quotes:

“They have a very different idea of what my life is from what it really is. They see that little tip of the iceberg, they don’t see everything else that goes into it.” (7:01)

“Your problems don’t go away, they just morph into something different. Your challenges.” (13:02)

“Are you doing it because you told everybody and you’re doing it because you care about them and what they think of you and it’s a bad look? Or are you doing something that you’re really following your heart.” (19:04)

“Sometimes quitting, or sometimes a “no,” doesn’t mean you’re never going to do a thing. It just means you’re not doing this thing right now.” (22:07)

Links

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