How The F*%K Did I Fall For A Sociopath? - Riley's Story

7 On Sundays™ Podcast

Would you be able to spot the signs of a person with Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD)? What does dating a sociopath (someone with ASPD) look like?

ASPD is a serious mental health condition characterized by a pattern of deceit. These individuals use their intelligence and charm to manipulate and exploit people and partners. While statistics report that only 1-4% of the population is diagnosed with ASPD, it appears that these numbers are higher. The reported numbers are lower because these individuals are very resistant to therapy and many never receive a formal diagnosis. To be diagnosed with ASPD, an individual must demonstrates a continuous pattern of behaviors with three or more of the following: persistent violation of social norms and laws, deceit, impulsivity, reckless disregard for the safety of self and others, aggression and hostility, consistent irresponsibility, and lack of remorse (DSM-5-TR).

According to David J. Lieberman, “A sociopath has no real sense of self, so they struggle with maintaining the impression that they create and project to the world. They are already wearing a mask, and dishonesty is another mask on top of that. This means that when they lie, they might sound like a caricature of an honest person rather than a genuinely honest person.”

So how would someone be able to spot an individual with ASPD in the wild world of dating?

Today, we are talking to Riley. As a college freshman, Riley had the misfortune to stumble across a sociopath and date him for several months. Tune in to hear how easily these individuals can become part of your inner circle and how difficult it is to process and heal from the mistrust and manipulation.

Riley’s story could happen to anyone and according to the police in her college town, these situations are more common than we think. If you think you may be in a relationship with someone with ASPD, please reach out for help immediately. You are not alone!

RESOURCES

Call your local police or National Centers for Victims of Crime (NCVC) 1-800-FYI-CALL if you suspect that you have been the victim of crimes

The National Domestic Violence Hotline [phone].SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224

The National Dating Abuse Helpline 1-866-331-9474 A service of Love is Respect, this national, 24-hour resource is specifically designed for teens and young adults. The Helpline is accessible by phone or online chat and offers real-time, one-on-one support from peer advocates trained to offer support, information, and advocacy to those involved in dating abuse relationships as well as concerned friends, parents, teachers, clergy, law enforcement, and service providers.

Love is RespectA collaboration between Break the Cycle and the National Dating Abuse Helpline, this web resource provides information and resources on dating violence and healthy dating attitudes and relationships for youth. The site includes an overview of the issue (e.g., early warning signs, types of abuse, the cycle of abuse), quizzes for teens to determine whether they are experiencing or inflicting abuse, a live chat feature that connects youth with a peer advocate 24/7, videos, a blog, and more. In addition to the live chat, Love is Respect connects youth to the National Dating Abuse Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453. Youth can also reach out for help by texting “loveis” to 22522.

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 Welcome to Seven on Sundays: Navigating Young Adult Challenges

00:47 Meet the Hosts: Candid Conversations on Tough Topics

01:31 Introducing Riley’s Story

06:13 Riley's Story: The Heartbreaking Tale of Deception

15:35 Things Weren’t Adding Up

19:45 The Shocking Discovery: Unveiling a Double Life

24:25 Analyzing the Deception: Red Flags and Reflections

27:45 Unpacking the Red Flags: A Closer Look at the Lies

31:02 The Psychology Behind Grandiose Lies

33:12 Having Everyone Fooled

35:09 The Aftermath: Confrontation, Closure, and Moving On

39:34 Learning from Experience: Advice and Insights

46:25 The Importance of Empathy and Red Flags in Relationships

49:41 Riley's Journey: Healing and Reflection

58:41 Final Thoughts and Advice for Vigilance in Relationships