ITL218: THE TALK: Ideas on When and How to Have It with Your Kids

In the Loop with Andy Andrews

On this week’s episode, I answer a listener question about dating and when it’s time to give your children “the talk.”

This week’s question is from a parent with two boys, so let me start by saying…

• I don’t think there’s anything more important in relationship-building than to tell those two boys how brothers act.
• Tell them your house is a laboratory they can use to become the kind of adults who can deal with all kinds of people after navigating through sibling disagreements.

There’s going to be plenty of time for boys to be wild-eyed about girls.

• 5th grade is not the time to press the dating issue.
• If your child has a friend of the opposite sex, don’t take them somewhere and tell them they are on a date.
• In my opinion, you are forcing something into this child’s head before it’s time.

You always want to have an open dialogue with your kids.

• I urge you to watch them closely, and watch the parents of your kids’ friends closely.
• Ask questions.
• Boys are much more comfortable talking while they’re doing something.
• If you can go throw the ball around or walk around the neighborhood—boys talk about these things much easier side to side than face to face.
• These activities give you a lot of time to talk, and you’ll be able to discern when the time is right to have “the talk.” The time is earlier rather than later.

Tune in to hear how Andy approached “the talk” with Austin, and how you can start influencing your kids’ decisions on finding the right partner for the future.

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