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Life with a narcissist is challenging, and Dr. Les Carter is here to assist. Whether you are feeling frustrated due to a narcissist's inability to blend well or you are feeling constantly invalidated by their need for control and their lack of empathy, Dr. C is your resource. He is committed to helping people become part of Team Healthy, which focuses on DRC: dignity, respect, and civility. In each of our episodes we will contrast the narcissistic patterns of life to the ways of Team Healthy.
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Complex trauma arises from a history of being deprived of healthy ingredients due to ongoing impositions of unhealthy patterns. Tim is an expert on the topic and brings his decades of experience to us as he explains the origins of this pattern while offering hope for long-term recovery. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your onl…
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Dr. C has an engaging discussion with Dr. Thais Gibson who discusses the dismissive avoidant attachment style. She explains there is a distinct difference between someone who has a history of reluctance versus a covert narcissist who is being manipulative.A best-selling author, Thais Gibson has a Ph.D. and over 13 certifications in modalities such …
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Dr. C welcomes Dr. Kerry McAvoy to today’s podcast. You’ll enjoy their lively discussion about the many ways narcissists attempt to keep you off balance. They are driven by a natural need to dominate and exploit, but as you understand their confusing mannerisms, you can detach from their harmful initiatives. Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., a psychologist…
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Dr. C welcomes therapist and author, Natalie Jambazian who recently released the book, Detoxing From A Narcissist. She describes the nature of toxicity common in narcissistic relationships and offers practical insights for becoming self-empowered. Natalie Jambazian, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and self-love and narcissistic abuse recov…
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Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your online presence and start your free 14-day trial at https://aura.com/DrCarter Sign up for Dr. Carter’s NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCommunity30 Dr. Les Carter is a best selling au…
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Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored Sign up for Dr. Carter’s NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCom…
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Dr. Les Carter is joined by Dr. Nadine Macaluso who specializes in treating relationship trauma and C-PTSD. Her personal story was depicted in the movie, The Wolf Of Wall St. starring Leonardo DiCaprio. Actress Margot Robbie’s played the role based on Nadine’s life. Once she broke away from her harrowing experiences, she took time to heal, eventual…
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Dr. C welcomes therapist Terri Cole who has worked with many individuals seeking to find appropriate relationship boundaries. She lays out many of the do’s and don’ts of managing boundaries, with the idea that it’s each person’s responsibility to oneself to be authentic. Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment …
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Dr. C interviews Meredith Miller who helps individuals traumatized by highly authoritarian family systems. Her psychological thrust goes beyond surviving, but in helping survivors shed the victim’s mindset so they can move fully into a rewarding adult identity. To find more of Meredith’s resources, visit https://www.innerintegration.com/. Thank you…
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Ramani Durvasula, who discusses information from her latest book, It’s Not You. Specifically, she walks us through some of the most common ways narcissists whittle at your capacity to trust in yourself. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matc…
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Dr. C has an enlightening discussion with Dr. Guy Winch about narcissists who simply cannot say: “I was wrong.” Dr. Winch identifies multiple reasons they have this difficulty, then discusses our best responses. To find more of Dr. Winch’s resources, go to https://www.guywinch.com/. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your online …
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Dan Neuharth who speaks into the topic of the fallout from controlling parents. His kind manner makes his wonderful insights quite easy to digest. If you had difficulties at the hands of a parent, there is hope. You can find out more about Dr. Neuharth at his website: https://www.drdanmftcounseling.com/ To read his articles i…
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Dr. C interviews Dr. Christine Cocchiola about her vital work with survivors of coercive control. She discusses how people can unwittingly become trapped in coercive relationships, then discusses a multitude of ways to address it therapeutically. Check out Dr. Cocchiola’s resources here: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/ Thank you to Aura …
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Therapist Jerry Wise and Dr. Les Carter discuss how many people have been required to fit into an unhealthy narcissistic system, meaning they were discouraged from being who they really are. In this engaging discussion Jerry discusses how to reverse that trend as you embark on your path of self-discovery. For the past 45 years, Jerry Wise has helpe…
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Your conscience is that inner voice reflecting your values and morality. Ideally it would be developed in the context of empathy and respect. Narcissists, however, tend to lean toward one extreme or another regarding matters of the conscience. They can be very rigid or they can be very loose. Either way, relationships suffer. Dr. Les Carter will br…
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Initially when you encounter a covert narcissist, you can be impressed by their seeming normalcy or charm. Living behind the veneer of the False Self, they have learned how to play the game of looking nice. But over time, one trait keeps showing up that alerts you to something more sinister. Being defined by selfishness and control, this pattern wi…
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Dr. C welcomes author and therapist, Darlene Lancer, whose expertise is the exploration of narcissists, codependents, and the problem of shame. She explains how necessary it is to be aware of a narcissist's dominance, especially if you are inclined to lay aside your true self in deference to the controller.Darlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and …
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Narcissists are threatened by you being distinctly you. This means they predictably use distorted thinking when you declare that you deserve respect, that you should be able to follow your own plans. Our guest, Dr. Jamie Zuckerman, explains how essential it is to know the intentions of narcissists as you then determine inwardly how you will proceed…
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Many narcissists make it their task to establish dominance and power. Dr. Les Carter explains, though, that such an effort is driven by many unresolved issues they don't want to reveal. Even when they refuse to come to terms with who they really are, you can learn to see through their facade, determining to respond with a very different mindset. Go…
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Dr. C speaks with Dr. Stephanie Sarkis about her book that describes how to recognize toxic relationship patterns so you can focus instead on staying true to who you need to be. Her insights and wisdom are sure to be beneficial. You can find Dr. Sarkis on her website: https://stephaniesarkis.com/. You can purchase her book, Healing From Toxic Relat…
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It's easy to be pleasant and friendly when you are in agreement with others. But Dr. C highlights how your level of maturity is on display in the midst of conflict. He discusses a narcissist's starting point when you have differences, then gives a stark contrast by identifying the healthy alternatives. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissi…
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Dr. C has an enlightening discussion with Dr. Jane McCartney from London as they break down the problems associated with sociopathic individuals. She has a wealth of information on this vital topic. Dr. McCartney is a Consultant Chartered Psychologist in the UK, working with a wide range of patients and clients. She has previously worked for the NH…
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Dr. Henry Cloud joins Dr. C today as he discusses ideas about the need for boundaries in key relationships. You can find Dr. Cloud at https://www.drcloud.com/. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored You can f…
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Recently, Dr. C recorded a webinar about the empath and the narcissist, and specifically he focused upon the necessity of maintaining healthy boundaries. In today's podcast he answers multiple questions generated by that webinar. If you want to purchase the resale of the webinar, go to https://survivingnarcissism.tv/webinar-the-empaths-superpower/.…
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Today Dr. C interviews author Debbie Mirza on her book, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. She describes what this pattern consists of, and the two of them discuss ways to stay out of their unique manipulations.To learn more about Debbie, visit her website at https://www.debbiemirza.com/.If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter ha…
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Dr. C welcomes psychiatrist and best-selling author, Dr. Judith Orloff. She has a deep history of studying and writing about the strengths inherent in the empathic approach to relationships. Their discussion focuses on understanding what is at stake when narcissists attempt to minimize the healthy ingredients of an empath. To learn more about Dr. O…
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Dr. C takes a detour from his normal talks about narcissism, describing a very difficult time in his own deep history. During this time, he encountered an unusual man, Miguel, who could almost be described as an angel in disguise. He was the exact opposite of the narcissistic people Dr. C has encountered on so many occasions. Go to https://betterhe…
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A common identifier of narcissism is the inability to receive input, as well as a refusal to tune into others' feelings and perceptions. Dr. Les Carter explains that behind such a pattern is a deeper issue...Narcissists have declared themselves to be the keepers of truth. They must be right. The more you can see through a narcissist's need to lord …
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Dr. C welcomes Rebecca Zung who has just released a new book, Slay The Bully, How To Negotiate With A Narcissist And Win. Being a family law attorney specializing in high conflict cases, she brings a wealth of information to the table as she explains the SLAY method of responding with narcissists. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpod…
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Trauma bonding inside unhealthy relationships arises as the recipient experiences ongoing emotional overload. Dr. Les Carter describes how you can break the bond by understanding what the narcissist hopes to gain, then by identifying and living into your best version of yourself. You can succeed in defining who you want to be, separate from the nar…
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Narcissists, being fully committed to the False Self, want you to assume they are the ones with the answers, when in fact, they are deeply insecure. In this episode, Dr. C responds to questions he has received from listeners for the purpose of showing you some of the many ways narcissists display their inner tension. They can't come to terms with t…
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A defining feature of narcissism is the willingness to manipulate. And because of other issues like the need for control, an attitude of entitlement, and raw selfishness, it is predictable that they will have serious anger issues too. Not a good combination. Dr. Les Carter welcomes therapist Jim Brillon who will discuss in detail how to maneuver th…
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Dr. Les Carter shares an insightful interview with psychologist Dr. Craig Malkin, who is a lecturer at the Harvard Medical School in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and who also maintains an active therapy practice. Dr. Malkin explains how narcissism is a combination of inborn temperament and learned patterns, and also discusses why they have such diffic…
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A hallmark of the mature personality is the willingness to take responsibility for who you are. Mature people understand that every stage of life presents challenges, and they welcome the process of introspection as they determine how to wisely respond. Narcissists, however, refuse to do the hard work of finding insight and making adjustments. Inst…
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Narcissists are predators who are quite willing to exploit and use you for their own personal gain. Dr. C describes their mindset as they engage with you, then he also identifies cues they look for to determine if indeed you will susceptible to their schemes. As you see through their patterns it will position you to remain true to yourself, staying…
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While narcissists try to present themselves as all together, behind the scenes there is much unfinished business they carry. Dr. C talks with special guest Kati Morton about what drives narcissists and how we can maintain emotional steadiness despite their lack of it. You can find Kati on her website, https://katimorton.com/. You can follow Kati on…
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Narcissists like to give the impression that they have life figured out and that you should defer to their mandates. Dr. Les Carter offers a very different perspective, discussing how they are actually profoundly needy and act as they do because they have not learned to come to terms with life's challenges. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnar…
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Dr. C welcomes trauma specialist Caroline Strawson who explains how trauma bonding to a narcissist impacts you physiologically. Having a history in the medical profession as well as surviving her own traumatic experiences, she brings a wealth of information and insight into this vital topic. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure you…
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Kerry McAvoy, author of Love You More. She clearly describes some primary signs to watch for as you determine the level of toxicity in a narcissist. As you understand how their outward actions are an indication of inner turmoil, you can learn not to be pulled in by their manipulations. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingna…
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The longer you engage with narcissists, the more they illustrate how internally conflicted they are. But instead of using healthy introspection, they turn outward as they try to make you responsible for their personal turmoil. Dr. C discusses this phenomenon by emphasizing that you are not required to enter into their combative games. Instead, you …
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Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored Dr. Ingrid Clayton joins Dr. C in discussing her own history of trauma and abuse and how it has impacted her. She is a talented therapist who specializes in trauma recov…
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If you are a healthy person, you know you are a work in progress. You seek input. You contemplate insights. You embrace accountability. Dr. Les Carter reminds you that such an approach is anathema to narcissists who instead will thwart others' efforts to discuss improvements. As a result, they persist in all sorts of maladaptive behaviors. Thank yo…
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Illogical as it may be, narcissists approach their closest relationships with the goal of emptying you of yourself, filling you instead with themselves. Dr. Les Carter outlines the many tactics they use, and explains their profoundly insecure reasoning. Your task is to become aware of their aims, then leaning into your uniqueness as fully as possib…
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Dr. Jacqui Lewis is a highly respected author and speaker who recently published the book, Fierce Love. She and Dr. C discuss how she learned to move away from toxic relationships by becoming devoted to the practice of love…beginning with oneself, then toward others, and then in the public arena. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secur…
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In the best case scenario, as you build relationships, you will be honest about your strengths and your weaknesses. Narcissists, however, are schemers attempting to establish superiority, and are not interested in honest relationships. In fact, their posturing is done for the purpose of setting themselves up as the gold standard, with you being the…
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Recently Dr. Les Carter interviewed Dr. Ramani Durvasula about how to break free from a narcissist. In this wide ranging discussion you’ll get to know more fully what she considers the greatest challenges as you become separate and distinct in your manner of participating in relationships. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your …
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On the surface, narcissists can appear decent or cooperative, but that falls apart when tension and anger arise inside relationships. Dr. Les Carter explains how narcissists carry many internal, dysfunctional patterns that show up in moments of conflict, so it is essential to know what you are up against. Pulling back the curtain, he explains how t…
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Central to the pattern of narcissism is an ongoing attitude of entitlement. Dr. Les Carter breaks down this topic by explaining the many ways this trait impacts the narcissist's interactions with you. As you clearly understand the lack of common sense associated with their entitlement, you can choose to step away from the "requirements" the narciss…
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David Zahl is the author of a new book, Low Anthropology, which describes the need to be authentic and honest in the ways relate, as opposed to creating and maintaining an ideal image of oneself. They discuss the need for letting go of the need to falsely impress, choosing an approach to relationships that embraces each other’s True Self. Thank you…
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Inevitably, when you have ongoing interactions with a narcissist, you learn that these individuals do not operate with positive intentions toward you. So should you fear the narcissist? Dr. Les Carter answers, yes and no. You should have a healthy fear that prompts you to use realistic care and caution. But, then he explains that they too harbor mu…
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