Melody Carlisle and Sabrina Bradley love romance and they do it out loud! Every Monday, these long-distance best friends recap romance novels from a comedic, intersectional feminist, sex-positive perspective. If you're itching for a BFF book club or just love raucous slumber party vibes, this is the show for you! Whether you've read the book or not, all are welcome! Giggling, tangents, and sincere joy abound.
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Hey HBs! This is part 2 of FRISCO'S KID by Suzanne Brockmann, the third book in the Tall, Dark, and Dangerous series! We hope you're ready for a little bit of action and more emotional growth! Bonus Content: getting nakie in the living room, "then I'll choose you," the miscommunication trope done with excellent communication, future purveyors of to…
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356.1 - Frisco's Kid by Suzanne Brockmann (Part 1)
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Happy Veteran's Day to all our American Listeners! It’s our annual Veterans Day episode and we decided to continue our journey through the Tall, Dark, and Dangerous series. Today is part 1 of FRISCO'S KID by Suzanne Brockmann! We were hoping for similar ridiculous antics to the first two books, but we got a very sincere recovery story with the foll…
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355.2 - Impromptu Match by Lily Mayne! (Part 2)
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HBs, we get to spend more time in the zany universe of Lily Mayne's Goliaths of Wrestling! Hot dad bod human Taylor and unabashed perv + style icon monster Holt can't get enough of each other and we can't get enough of them! When you add addictive side characters and truly hilarious drunken shenanigans, you get a masterpiece. Bonus content: Sabrina…
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355.1 - Impromptu Match by Lily Mayne! (Part 1)
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HBs! We have discovered IMPROMPTU MATCH by Lily Mayne and we'll never be the same again! This is part one, in which we meet depressed and unfulfilled human Taylor Hough. He works a job he hates, he's given up everything he loves for a boyfriend who left him for a hippie, and there's no end in sight to his dearth of contentment. Until he accidentall…
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354.2 - Bewitching the Boss by Jessa Kane
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It's Halloween week and the characters in BEWITCHING THE BOSS by Jessa Kane were entirely too unafraid! Their fear bones are broken, but other important bones aren't! We've got a party-planning stalker and a virgin who has taken a vow of misery, but is DELIGHTED when he realizes he's being stalked. Our jaws where on the floor the whole time and we …
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354.1 - Knot Today Satan by Calliope Stewart
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Happy Halloween week, HBs! We're celebrating with an accidental omegaverse summoning with KNOT TODAY SATAN by Calliope Stewart! Turns out, the devil is an alpha and the secret ingredient is slick.... goddess bless romance. Bonus Content: assuming your niche interest is common knowledge, Mel was reading signs that weren't there, coordinating scents …
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353.2 - 7th Podiversary (Part 2)
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We're wrapping up our 7th Podiversary with a torturous session of Would You Rather and we round out the episode with two Quickies for you! Mel recaps MARROW by Trisha Wolfe and Brynn Weaver and Sabrina recaps SEXTING THE SILVERFOX by K.C. Crowne! Thank you, Listener! For 7 years we've shared books, squees, tears, hard limits, giggles, and we wouldn…
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353.1 - 7th Podiversary Celebration! (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! It’s time to pat ourselves on the back, update our various watches, and figure out some would you rathers. It’s our 7th podiversary celebration!!! Get ready for our annual State of the Podcast, HB Authors, Hard Limits Watch, Kink Watch, HB Etiquette, Rabbit Hole Watch, and more! Tomorrow we'll be back to torture each other with more Would …
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Hey HBs! We're here to finish up Nikolai and Myst's tale with fated hostage-taking, forced orgasms, and misunderstandings of unfinished memories! Get stoked! Lady Loves: Sabrina: 360 degree rolling suitcases. What a revelation! Mel: #plantdad instagram (also #plantdaddy). And specifically @theplantpapi. Such a good follow! Want to support the show?…
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352.1 - The Warlord Wants Forever by Kresley Cole (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! We're doing our first re-release since Sabrina became Mel's full-time partner-in-crime! This is part 1 of THE WARLORD WANTS FOREVER by Kresley Cole! Since we announced that our next Patreon Deep Dive is going to be the first 10ish books in the Immortals After Dark series, starting at book 3, we've had a bunch of Listener saying "but what a…
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We're back with the second half of THE KING by Nana Malone! Our plucky secret agents are on their very first field mission and (bom chicka wow wooow) they're posing as newlyweds! Don't worry, they commit to the bit. Bonus Content: Georg and Dreorg, forehead kisses, red hot narration, and so much more! Lady Loves: Sabrina: Having an endless pile of …
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351.1 - The King by Nana Malone (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! It's our first Nana Malone book! THE KING is book 1 of the Gentleman Rogue series and we were stoked to jump into contemporary spy times. What we didn't prep ourselves for? AN AMNESIA PLOT!!!! Bonus Content: Mel has a yuck that goes ow, Mel DID manage to swerve a little Mikey after our Magic Mike XXL watch party, Sabrina read the prequel T…
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350.2 - How the Marquess Was Won by Julie Anne Long (Part 2)
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Hey HBs!! The pals are back with HOW THE MARQUESS WAS WON by Julie Anne Long! When we left off, Jules had asked Phoebe to become his mistress and she turned him down HARD. Now these two crazy kids are, unbeknownst to either of them, both heading to London for more balls and other EnglandTimes ish. While Phoebe basks in the glow of being the crowd f…
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350.1 - How the Marquess Was Won by Julie Anne Long (Part 1)
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Hey HBs!! Mel and Sabrina are recapping HOW THE MARQUESS WAS WON by Julie Anne Long! We've got a lowly school teacher who is drafted to be the paid companion of a former pupil and a Marquess who has a plan, gosh darnit! And it does NOT include becoming enamored of his hopeful fiancée's pal! But there's a country party, an opera singer, a forest ram…
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349.2 - Triple Sec by TJ Alexander (Part 2)
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Hey HBs!! We're back with part two of TRIPLE SEC by TJ Alexander! We jump right back in with a snowed-in vacation with only one fireplace! And that fireplace is utilized BEAUTIFULLY! Bonus Content: rich people shit, useless Tops, gendered vs. neutral terms, a not-so-survival trope, and so much more! Lady Loves: Mel: checking out movies from the lib…
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349.1 - Triple Sec by TJ Alexander (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here recapping TRIPLE SEC by TJ Alexander! It's a contemporary, queer, polyamorous romance that had them chatting for more than 3 hours (seriously, Mel cut over an hour of their nonsense. You're WELCOME.). We've got a polyamorous married couple, a certified and embittered lesbian, and a whole bunch of amazing queer and …
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348.2 - Butcher & Blackbird by Brynn Weaver (Part 2)
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Hey HBs! It's time to get to the spicy scenes in BUTCHER & BLACKBIRD by Brynn Weaver!! And whooweee did they deliver. In this second half, we've got a corpse puppet show (is that a tag now?), some excellent hurt/comfort into schmecksy times, and the most romantic proposal in the universe.... if you're a serial unaliver loves an empty eye socket. Wh…
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348.1 - Butcher and Blackbird by Brynn Weaver (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here to squeal about two serial killers finding their HEA in BUTCHER & BLACKBIRD by Brynn Weaver! From the best captive meet-cute to dinner disasters, this book is a fizzy delight. Bonus Content: personal piercing TikTok, the Necessary Evils series by Onley James, coding for murderers, chainsaw noises, and so much more!…
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347.2 - The Undertaking of Hart and Mercy by Megan Bannen (Part 2)
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Hey HBs! Here is part 2 of THE UNDERTAKING OF HART AND MERCY by Megan Bannen! These enemies become lovers and then a third act death makes us lose our ever-loving minds. Buckle up! Bonus Content: Sabrina is a #SherlockHolmes, Mel has to slow down on a beautiful parenting moment, and so much more! Lady Loves: Sabrina: share those pictures! Doesn't m…
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347.1 - The Undertaking of Hart and Mercy by Megan Bannen (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! Today we're bringing you part 1 of THE UNDERTAKING OF HART AND MERCY by Megan Bannen! Mercy is trying to save her family's undertaking business and things would be a lot easier if a certain surly marshal would just leave her alone. Meanwhile, Hart is a demigod just trying to do his job and this bright and shiny undertaker has nothing but r…
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Hey y’all! We’re popping into your feed with an exciting announcement: Heaving Bosoms is joining the BLEAV Network! (pronounced “believe”) First, HBs: THANK YOU for all your support! We got on their radar because you listen; without you, we’re shouting into the void. Y’all are so badass. We’re really excited about this next phase of Heaving Bosoms …
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346 - It Had To Be You by Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are mad and they are recapping IT HAD TO BE YOU by Susan Elizabeth Phillips. This is a doozy! Good news, though, Mel's bringing back the custom intros... so that's fun! Content Warnings: episode includes discussions of sexual assault, including in young childhood, on-page violent rape, statutory rape, rampant misogyny, mali…
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Ep. 345 - A Hunger Like No Other by Kresley Cole
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HBs, we're back with more Immortals After Dark by Kresley Cole! The second (first?) book in the series, A HUNGER LIKE NO OTHER, did not disappoint! This book starts at 11 and then refuses to simmer down. Get ready for big feelings, incredulity, and enthusiastic cackling (though, you should be used to that by now). There were so many times when Mel …
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Ep. 344 - Sorry, Bro by Taleen Voskuni
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Hey y'all! Mel and Sabrina are here with SORRY, BRO by Taleen Voskuni! It's a gorgeous sapphic contemporary between two Armenian-American women, one of whom is on a serious journey to self-discovery. This book weaves a beautiful love story within a rich tapestry of Armenian history and culture. It was GORGEOUS. Bonus Content: Mel's son is the Pitbu…
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Ep. 343 - Avaritia by Colette Rhodes
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here with AVARITIA by Colette Rhodes! This series is much beloved by both of them and this book didn't disappoint. Plus, we've got a heroine that is 100% HMHB (Hot Mess HB). It's a grumpy and adorably delusional Shadow Daddy plus a sunshine, go-with-the-flow, sex-positive maximalist. We went into this book with the prom…
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Ep. 342 - Wicked Intentions by Elizabeth Hoyt
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Hey HBs! We're here with a brand new historical era: Dickens' Times! Elizabeth Hoyt came out swinging with WICKED INTENTIONS, the first book in her Maiden Lane series. We've got a do-gooding heroine who needs cash for her orphanage, a bad boy aristocrat who needs entree into London's worst neighborhood, a murder mystery, a vigilante hero clown, and…
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Ep. 341 - Artek by Honey Phillips
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It's been a minute since we've recapped an alien romance, and HERE WE ARE, HBs! ARTEK by Honey Phillips manages to be both Western Times and alien, which is hard to pull off. This slice-of-life Seven Brides for Seven Brothers retelling was a romp from beginning to end! Bonus Content: Sabrina's Libby nemesis is still abusing her with book 2 of the S…
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Ep. 340 - Love & Other Disasters by Anita Kelly
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here with LOVE & OTHER DISASTERS by Anita Kelly! This queer contemporary romance is set on an amateur cooking show. Dahlia is a divorcee who quit her job to be there and doesn't quite know how she'll pay rent if she doesn't win the $100k prize. Meanwhile, London is the show's first non-binary contestant, this is their n…
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Ep. 339 - The Spymaster's Lady by Joanna Bourne (Part 2)
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Hey HBs! We're here with the second half of THE SPYMASTER'S LADY by Joanna Bourne! Our couple is on a fall-in-love trek on foot all the way to London and boy does Annique feel guilty about being attracted to boy Grey and Robert... little does she know, they're the same bloke! Come with us as we finish our journey through spy times! Bonus Content: M…
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Ep. 338 - The Spymaster's Lady by Joanna Bourne (Part 1)
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Hey HBs! We're here with THE SPYMASTER'S LADY by Joanna Bourne! It's great to be back in France Times with an extra dose of intrigue and nefarious plots! We meet Annique, a 19 year old lifelong spy and Grey, the second in command of all the British spies right after the French Revolution. They are undoubtedly enemies who can't trust each other, unl…
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Ep. 337 - The Villa by Nora Roberts
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Hey HBs! We're here with our first Nora Roberts book, THE VILLA! It's winerytimes and the Giambelli matriarch is here to shake up with corporate structure! But also intrigue and murder with no less than 3,000 characters. And in this head-hopping 3rd person book, everyone (and we mean EVERYONE) gets a POV moment. Plus, not one but two romances! Bonu…
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Ep. 336 - Challengers with Jenny and Katee! (Movie)
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Hey HBs! Mel's here with gueesstttssss! BFFs of Mel and the pod Jenny Nordbak and Katee Robert (of Bonkers Romance) are here to recap the movie Challengers, starring the one and only Zendaya. Jenny and Mel had no idea what they were in for and BOY did this romantic psychological thriller deliver. It's so sexy! And messy! And mean! And baffling! And…
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Ep. 335 - Whispers of the Deep by Emma Hamm
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Hey HBs! We're here with masterpiece of sorcery! Emma Hamm's WHISPERS OF THE DEEP took every single one of Sabrina's phobias and said we shall overcome with seggsy swooniness! It's a monster romance between a merman and a human deep, DEEP under the sea. Like, in the vast deep. He kidnaps her to get information that his people will use to destroy he…
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Ep. 334 - Just For Show by Jae
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Hey HBs! We're here with a contemporary sapphic romance! It's a fake relationship extravaganza with a buttoned-up couple's counselor and a cool, alt actor. CW: Mel got really triggered by this book, so look out for discussions of disordered eating, diet culture, rampant fatphobia, and more. Bonus Content: Mel cut her own hair!, where is all the rol…
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Ep. 333 - Beneath Black Sails by Clare Sager
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Hey HBs! We're back with another book we didn't know was part 1 of a 4 part series with the same couple. WHOOPS, but no regrets. BENEATH BLACK SAILS by Clare Sager is a historical fantasy pirate adventure with a famous pirate queen and the pirate hunter sent to take her down. This heroine is brash and fun and we can't get enough of her. Bonus Conte…
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Ep. 332 - D'Vaughn & Kris Plan A Wedding by Chencia C. Higgins
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Hey HBs! This week we've got a delicious contemporary lesbian romance: D'Vaughn and Kris Plan a Wedding by Chencia C. Higgins! This perfect morsel has so many things we love! Reality TV, fat rep, queer rep, overcoming religious trauma, loving and eccentric families, and WOWZA the spicy times are faaaantastic. This is a hard recommend from us! Bonus…
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Ep. 331 - On Dublin St. by Samantha Young
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Hey HBs! We're here with the contemporary Scottish romance ON DUBLIN STREET by Samantha Young! It's Edinburgh, it's family tragedy, it's basing life decisions on great bathtubs. There's an emotionally skittish heroine, an alpha hero who's eight years older, a friends-with-benefits arrangement, and a little too much boundary pushing for Mel's comple…
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Ep. 330 - The Highwayman by Kerrigan Byrne
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Wooo! HBs we're here with book 1 of the Victorian Rebels series, THE HIGHWAYMAN by Kerrigan Byrne. We loooooved this book! As Sabrina is a longtime Kerrigan Byrne fangirl, it's not a shock. We've got a childhood-spouses-to-lovers book that knocked our socks off! But yikes, it gets dark. Lady Loves: Sabrina: if you're lonely, but don't have anyone a…
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Ep. 329 - Death's Obsession by Avina St. Graves
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Hey HBs! In this episode, Sabrina and Mel recap DEATH'S OBSESSION by Avina St. Graves. It's a dark, paranormal, stalker romance that gave us KING OF FLESH AND BONE, SING ME TO SLEEP, and SOUL EATER vibes. Overall, they enjoyed the experience, but were generally underwhelmed. But! They talk a lot about reader "meters" and it's appropriately scientif…
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Ep. 328 - Love for the Cold-Blooded, or The Part Time Evil Minion's Guide to Accidentally Dating a Superhero by Alex Gabriel
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Hey HBs! We're here with LOVE FOR THE COLD-BLOODED, OR THE PART-TIME EVIL MINION'S GUIDE TO ACCIDENTALLY DATING A SUPERHERO by Alex Gabriel! Boy, oh boy, this MM superhero fantasy novel is fan-damn-tastic; the voice is SO UNIQUE, the world-building is incredible, and the romance is SMOKING HOT. There's accidental sex work, it highlights the power o…
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Ep. 327 - Just for the Cameras by Viano Oniomoh
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Hey HBs! We're here to recap JUST FOR THE CAMERAS by Viano Oniomoh! It's a fluffy contemporary with delicious and supported sex work, amazing communication, a sad sad Sebastian boy, best friendship goals, and an MMF menage that made us feel all gooey and sparkly inside. And WOW the hot hot sexy times! This is definitely an erotic romance. Bonus Con…
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Ep. 326 - Claimed by Elle Kennedy
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Hey HBs! It's Post-Apocalyptic Times!! We're recapping CLAIMED by Elle Kennedy, and wow is outlaw country sex and kink positive! We've got a heroine with a BIG secret, a hero with a vendetta, and a passel of boys we can't get enough of! Bonus Content: Michael's angry bird artistic debut, that potent post-apocalyptic pussy, sexy hit point increases,…
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Ep. 325 - Ravished by Amanda Quick
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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here to recap RAVISHED by Amanda Quick! It's a historical with a fossil-obsessed heroine, a VERY misunderstood hero, a dangerous ring of robbers, and a cavernous ruination!! Bonus Content: Mel got her 5 yards of dirt delivered, Sabrina wants to be BFFs with this heroine, the gals go on a crustacean tangent, Mel does a b…
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Ep. 324 - Happy St. Vincent Day!!
2:02:12
2:02:12
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Hey HBs! HAPPY ST. VINCENT WEEK! Tomorrow, April 2nd, is officially the 3rd (or maybe 4th?) annual St. Vincent Day! Where we celebrate Sebastian St. Vincent, the misunderstood bad boy who's really just broken and wants to ensconce your feet in warmth and feed you and plan funerals so you don't have to and become the sexist casino business man and t…
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Ep. 323 - Taken to Voraxia by Elizabeth Stevens!
1:44:09
1:44:09
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1:44:09
Hey HBs! We haven't recapped an alien romance in a while... dare we say TOO LONG! We're here today with TAKEN TO VORAXIA by Elizabeth Stevens! As of the release of this episode, Mel has read through book 6 without any plans to stop. This series is sooo good! TW: discussions of sexual assault, slavery, and forced abortions. Bonus Content: Mel can't …
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Ep. 322 - In the Middle of Somewhere by Roan Parrish (Part 2)
1:51:41
1:51:41
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1:51:41
Hey y'all! We're here with part 2 of IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE by Roan Parrish! We left you in the middle of their first (and only?) fight, which we acknowledge was a mean thing to do. But! There's an HEA! CW: for discussions of parental death and attempted suicide. Bonus Content: Mel did some hyperfocus "cleaning" because there was no one around …
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Ep. 321 - In the Middle of Somewhere by Roan Parrish (Part 1)
1:51:55
1:51:55
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1:51:55
Hey HBs! We're here with IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE by Roan Parrish! This is part 1 because we loved this book soooooo much. This MM romance features a tattooed professor with anxiety and a super burly, cabin-building, care-taking dreamboat. Bonus Content: Mel's bringing big grown-up-lady-sleepover energy, Sabrina is now tailoring reading lists to …
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Ep. 320 - Any Duchess Will Do by Tessa Dare (Part 2)
2:05:41
2:05:41
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2:05:41
Hey HBs! We're back with ANY DUCHESS WILL DO by Tessa Dare! We restart our tale right after the library finger-b*ng, and these two are convinced that they only have until the end of the week. Will he gut his BFF for this woman?? Content warning: discussions of infant death and mentions of miscarriage. Bonus Content: Mel just dropped her family off …
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Ep. 319 - Any Duchess Will Do by Tessa Dare (Part 1)
1:52:50
1:52:50
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1:52:50
Hey HBs! We're here to recap ANY DUCHESS WILL DO by Tessa Dare! It's an Englandtimes book featuring a sad, broken Duke, his desperate mother, and the serving girl who will change them all forever. Bonus Content: Mel's got a mesakkah dick on her phone screen now, Sabrina learned about screenshots a long time ago, Sabrina has special feelings about s…
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Ep. 318 - The Girl with Stars in Her Eyes by Xio Axelrod (Part 2)
2:05:27
2:05:27
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2:05:27
Hey HBs! It's time to cross the finish line of THE GIRL WITH THE STARS IN HER EYES by Xio Axelrod. Toni is starting to mesh with and carve out her role in the band, Seb is remining himself of his no-fraternization clause constantly, and Kandy is ready to make some waves! Y'all, this childhood best-friends to lovers set in the soundscape of an all-g…
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