APEX Express – 12.29.22 ARU’s CAMP for Emerging Leaders Reflections

KPFA - APEX Express

APEX Express is a weekly magazine-style radio show featuring the voices and stories of Asians and Pacific Islanders from all corners of our community. The show is produced by a collective of media makers, deejays, and activists.

This week’s episode highlights Asian Refugees United (ARU)’s CAMP for Emerging Leaders. Robin Gurung interviews three past participants: Nawal Rai, Chandra Bastola and Kamana Dhimal.

CAMP for Emerging Leaders is a 5­-day leadership training workshop designed to build a network of vibrant community leaders, organizers, artists, and activists in the Bhutanese Community currently living in the United States. Our mission is to train Bhutanese community leaders, organizers, artists and activists to become agents for change. CAMP is an immersion experience into many elements of personal and community transformation.

Asian Refugees United builds intergenerational and inter-ethnic power for positive lasting change through sharing art, healing, culture and political engagement. Started in 2007 as a project of Forward Together, ARU addresses workers’ rights and community health issues in general by building the voice, visibility and power of Bhutanese and Vietnamese immigrant and refugee communities in East Oakland.

Donate to their work here: https://sites.google.com/caasf.org/aru/donate

AACRE Thursdays is monthly radio show featuring an organization from the AACRE: Asian American for Civil Rights and Equality. AACRE Thursdays premiers every third Thursday of the month at 7pm. Find more APEX Express Shows here.

Transcript [12/29/23] ARU “Camp Leadership”

[00:00:00]

Hello everyone. Welcome to acrete on Epic Express Radio. I’m your host, Robin Goong, and I’m from United, one of the 11 organizations from the Asian-American Civil Rights Equality Network, also known as the Network. Today we are reflecting on Asian and refugees United Camp for emerging leaders, and we will be interviewing na.

And to share about [00:01:00] their experiences of participating at Asian Refugees United Annual Youth Leadership Camp as Refugees United, also known as aru, is an art and healing leadership center. Our mission is to cultivate and rest, restore wholeness in communities impacted by displacement for embodied training programs, collective power building, ancestor practices, and connection to.

We envision a home and belonging for all are. We started in 2016 in the San Francisco Bay area. Currently we are operating in two states. Our headquarter in California and our youth center in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania,

as in Refugees United Designs, and produces a yearlong youth leadership training program called Camp for Immers Leaders, also known as. Camp is an immersion experience into the many elements of personal and community [00:02:00] transformation. This program is designed to build a network of vibrant community, of refugee leaders, organizers, artists, and activists to become, as in each year, the theme and the focus of the program are developed collaboratively by project coordinators and participants to be responsive to the needs of the c.

This year, we had about 20 young and amazing leaders participate in our program. Each of these participants were divided into free groups based on their interest areas, his storytelling group, mental health group, and educational group. Tonight we have novel arrived from the Storytelling group, VA from the Mental Health Group, and Kamal from the Education Group.

I want to welcome each one of you on this. So, Welcome everyone. Thank you. Thank you. Thank [00:03:00] you so much. All right. How about we begin with, um, each one of your introductions, tell us who you are.

Yes sir. Alright, Sandra, you wanna begin? Yeah, so hi everyone. Uh, my name is John Vato. I am one of the former refugees from, uh, Nepal. I was born in refugee camp and lived there for like 14 years. After that, uh, we migrated to United States, uh, from league, uh, um, at the beginning we came to Scranton, Pennsylvania, where Grant, uh, president Biden was born there.

And, um, I, I lived there for like, I think eight years. I did my high school there and went to college after that, after graduating college, then, uh, we moved to [00:04:00] Harrisburg. So currently I’m living in Harrisburg and uh, I’m also working in one of the major pharmaceutical company as a business analyst. Um, and also I’m currently working as a volunteer in one of our community organization at a religious organization, and I’m working there as a media coordinator.

Uh, that’s pretty much it from my site. Thank you, Sandra. Thank you, Noel. Do you wanna go next?

Hi, um, I’m Noal Wright. Uh, I am a 21 years old college student. Um, I currently attend Des Moines, uh, area Community College here in Des Moines, Iowa. And I was born and raised in Nepal, uh, in pad camp where I spent, um, almost. Uh, 12 years of life there in, uh, in camp, and I moved here in [00:05:00] Des Moines back in 2013.

Um, since then, I have been living, uh, in Iowa, in Des Moines, Iowa. And I have been right now just focusing on school and also trying to work with Asian, um, Asian refugee, United to like volunteer and give my time to my community. Um, so.

Thanks all. Hello. I’m the last participant for this interview. I was born in, also the Bhutanese refugee camps and my journey to the United States started when I was only. Five years old and so many people ask me like, what do you remember about Nepal? And my response is always the same. I was so young, so like a lot of my memories started here.

Although I am still fluent in both Nepali and English because my parents never allowed me to like feel otherwise. But I don’t really have a lot [00:06:00] of memories from the camps. I do have, uh, ever like remember everything from like here, from like starting kindergarten here, all the way to where I am currently.

So I’m currently a senior in Penn Manor High School, which is a high school in suburban Lancaster. I don’t know if you guys are ever, ever heard of the area, but it is a small city in central Pennsylvania. And I’m planning for college right now and a u has kind of helped with that to see that I really love social work, so I’m planning to major in social work and also be on the pre-med track.

Great. Thank you. Thank you. All of you. Um, I mean, all of you mentioned that, uh, you all. We’re born in refugee camps in Nepal. I mean, KA I started, uh, sharing about some of the experiences like, um, I’m curious, like, and [00:07:00] um, do you have any, do you wanna share any experiences of grow up in camps? Um, any fond memories or challenges?

Um, yeah, I can, I can go with that. Um, when I think about back home, um, back home in refugee camp sometime, like, it feels like a dream and like, that sounds so cliche, but it’s like sometimes it feels like this is a life that, you know, I. Like, I didn’t, I don’t feel like I lived that life, um, in this life, you know, because it just, the life that I live now is so, so, so different than the life that I grew up, the place that I grew up in.

So, um, such thing just like, just housing, it’s like, you know, talking about housing, um, the house is like, There’s things that we have right now. Um, let’s talk about those little things like heater or coolers, you [00:08:00] know, like that little basic needs, uh, to survive. Though we, those were things not very necessary, um, for the temperature that we lived in, um, that we grew up in.

But still, like those little things that really make me think sometimes and how, um, things that I take, uh, for granted now, nowadays, um, and going up in Nepal, I feel like there’s just. Feeling of nostalgia, like, um, that I, that I get just like thinking about eating, you know, having to get to eat one piece of candy was that would bring so much happiness and, you know, that is not the same and, uh, anymore and it just, I miss, I miss being grateful.

I. Not saying that I’m not grateful right now, now just the fact that like, you know, I was able to find that little happiness or I was able to appreciate those little things. Um, so those things are definitely something that [00:09:00] I miss a lot about. Um, because here our life is, our life really does depend on like, , we’re always busy and I feel like we kind of miss track of focusing on little things, being, um, thankful for the little things that we have.

Um, and yeah, that’s, that’s something I really miss and I remember just, um, being happy and like the most without having this reason to like, you know, to, uh, especially like, uh, anything that was. Like anything big or anything, you know, like, especially with the money and stuff, we didn’t grow up with the money and it, it’s, I I say the feeling, I miss the feeling of just being home and like feeling of, uh, being connected to the people that I lived around with.

Um, so that’s kind of where my, a lot of my memories comes from. That feeling of that community and just being surrounded by people that. [00:10:00] that knows, you know, that you feel that makes you feel like you are home. So that’s, that would be my take on that.

Thank you so much, Nolo. How about Chandra? Uh, so I seriously feel like I’m missing a lot. Like I wanted to, uh, really tell life again. You know, it’s so much, uh, memory attached. It’s emotion and everything. Like from your childhood to the teenage point, right? And going through those little, uh, little hurdles and everywhere, going out of the boundary, playing with kids like wish to play the ball, you know, with, with the socks, you know, wish to make a ball with the , with the socks and the refu wrapping papers and everything, right.

And just running down. When it’s raining, this splashing [00:11:00] the water and then swimming in river. So it was a lot of fun. I mean, I wish I can live that life again, you know? And which is truly missing here. I mean, we don’t normally get to experience that in here. Um, when comparing to a lot of kids nowadays, you know, we, they are raise, they’re like raising in America currently.

They don’t have much option other than. Playing on phone and they don’t have touch to the nature, they can’t connect to nature as they only go maybe vacation once a month, or not even once a month. I mean once a year, right? So, That kind of the environmental touch, the sense in your life is missing. And I wish I can relie that.

Jlu, I mean, a lot of memories and beautiful, uh, time is spent with other friend and neighborhood, um, that, that the brotherhood that we share in community. So yeah,[00:12:00]

I, I certainly miss that. Um, Time that, yeah, we used to spend in the open field. Um, definitely the sense of community, right? Mm-hmm. , um, yeah, and like novel said, the sense of appreciation to folks, uh, the people who have, uh, lives in data camps, right? Mm-hmm. . Yeah. Um, Kana already kind of started, uh, on this. Um, I wanted to kind of hear.

The experiences of, uh, uh, that in, during the transition, like from the refugee camp to resettlement in the United States, like what was it like, what do you remember? Uh, can you share, uh, some of the experiences of, uh, the, that transition from the camp to the United? Sure, [00:13:00] of course. I really appreciate hearing about Chandra and all those experiences because for me, I didn’t live those experiences by actually living it because I don’t remember it.

But I lived through those experiences because of those stories that I hear. So it’s always so nice to hear about my birth country. For me. Coming to the United States at the young of age of five, I also had two older siblings. Right. And for them, I feel like the transition might have been a little bit harder, but for me, I got out of E SSO when I was in the second grade.

I was told I was always bright. So for me it was really easy to catch the like, Culture here, and also to learn the language. But for me, I just really struggled with, uh, I imposter syndrome. And I also really struggled with like the differences in culture, the taboos that my parents would tell me. And then I’d go outside of my house and I’d be like, that’s not what’s true out there.

Like I talked a lot [00:14:00] about. Menstrual struggles that I’ve had before with like the taboos and stuff, and a lot of my writing that I do because I feel like it’s really important to acknowledge that because in, um, the Nepali society, it’s told that like menstruation is impure and stuff like that. But as soon as I’d like step outside of my house, Like everyone, even on my period, they would still hug me.

I would still be able to eat with them. In fact, I was working at like a fast food place where I was making food for people during my menstruation cycle back at home. I was not allowed to sit at the table. So I think things like that are just what like really touched me. And I just struggled with my identity until, I think it was like middle school when I transitioned from like a city school until more of like a suburban, rural.

Um, school district. And from there, that’s when I felt like culture shock, because while the city school was really [00:15:00] populated with like racial ethnicities, my um, rural schools were more like filled with white kids. And that’s when I felt like I was like a sore thumb in the midst of like so many. Blonde hair and like white skinned people.

I felt really left out and I struggled really, really hard then. But then after I got through that phase and after I accepted my identity and I learned a lot more about my background and the reason why we have menstruation. Taboo was actually that it’s for sanitary purposes, right? It’s not because I was impure, it was because before they didn’t have stuff like menstruation, pads.

They didn’t have tampons. So that’s why they would keep the girls a little bit separate from their families. So after I learned the reality instead of the taboo, that’s when I learned to accept myself. That’s when I learned to accept the culture, and that’s also when I learned to educate others and embrace my culture.

So for me, it was just learning. [00:16:00] A lit a little bit more about what I didn’t know and also getting a lot closer to my family. Wow. What, what is Ernie Counter? Uh, thank you so much for sharing. Um, Sandra, uh, and, um, how was your experiences like during the, the transition time?

Do one of you want to share, um, transition time from the refugee camp to the Newland, uh, the United States of America? Uh, what was it like? Um, Experiences or the emotions, the challenges, or any fond memories that you want to share?[00:17:00]

Yeah, so, um, initially, um, if you wanna start, start from beginning, I think, um, at the initial phase, right, it did not meet our expectation cuz uh, Back in the camp when we were given orientation about the America, right. Uh, we were shown a different picture of the America. And then when, when it came to the real, it was not as what they saw in the picture, right in, in those videos, like, um, In orientation they had so, like, so much luxury and everything, like the, the boss would come to pick your kids, take you to home, right?

Uh, take you, take, take them to school, bring them back to home, and all those facilities that they were, uh, swinging in those orientation. But um, when we came to the reality that was not true. I mean, it could be true for some people, but for, in our [00:18:00] case, that was not true. So we had come to different experience.

We had to walk to the school every day, and my school was like, I think two miles away from my house. So I had to wake up early in the morning and go to school, walk two mile, come back, two mile, right? And it was so challenging. And then, We didn’t even know. I didn’t even know how to use the public transportation at that time.

And on top of that, like blending into the new culture and speaking English was the end of the hurdle to come over, right? Cuz uh, we had a British English accent and then it does not match with Americans. So people normally used to make fun of you and being harassed and his school were taking public trans transportation.

So there are a lot of challenges at the beginning. And as, as a time went through and then we started to learn about new culture and started knowing more about the cities and [00:19:00] how things work. Then it eventually started getting better. So it takes at least three, around like two to three years to adapt to new cultures and learning new things in community.

Yeah, so it was initially challenging for me.

Yeah. Um, I can go home. I’m sorry. Sure, go ahead. No, sorry to cut you off that. Um, but yeah, I totally agree. Um, kind of just piggyback, piggyback, uh, piggyback off like just what Kana said, and, uh, Chandra, like for me, it wa like the transition to the state was, uh, it was like a climbing a mountain, basically just because of, um, lot of things.

It was just a big cultural shock. First of all, like go back in Nepal. I was a very, um, not go America like, and uh, like I was kinda like, um, against Immigra immigrating through the states. [00:20:00] And like I, um, which I don’t re uh, don’t really remember exactly why, but, um, coming to coming here and it’s, it wa it’s a different experience, you know, like you come to this, to this place and space where, um, you have only.

Fantasize of like, you know, that you have only heard of, um, through stories, through movies and, and like when you actually get there, it’s not. It’s not all that, you know, it’s not all the fancy, um, fancy, like fancy dinners or like, you know, this nice, beautiful big houses or like this and that. So like to come to the states and.

Like being put into this house, this, um, like, you know, this house where basically it’s a house of cockroaches and like, um, all this insects in the house. Like, you know, seeing [00:21:00] that and experiencing those, uh, those experience when I first moved to the states and. It was like, wow, this is not what I expected.

And that’s not the, and that’s like just a little thing. And I feel like co and coming to, uh, coming here, and I have always knew that and I was different. I always felt different. I always been different than, uh, than other Norm, uh, nor those other kids that I grew up playing. You know, while my, uh, guy’s friend, uh, when we were young, one of my guy’s friend go play soccer and go play sports.

I loved dance. I would go. With my girlfriends. Um, and I would do theaters, you know, all those stuff. Like it’s, and like I never realized what it was, you know? Um, and coming to the states and seeing, understanding, uh, What that part of me, you know, that part of me who wanted to do that, uh, that part of me, that when a guy, uh, wa a guy and a girl walked, passed by, I’m [00:22:00] like, oh, this is a really good looking man.

Like, where did that come from? Those kind of questions. Like, I was living in this, um, this, this life where I really didn’t know who I was. And though there was a lot of challenges that came, um, came, came, came to me, you know, uh, that I had to. Uh, realizing my sexuality, you know, and finally coming to the term where, to myself, where, okay, maybe I am d I am actually different than everyone in that way, you know, like I realized I was gay and that was not the end of it.

I was my sexuality. You know, after that I had to navigate my way through how do I, how do I, uh, explain this to my family? You know, how do I explain this to my community? Um, so. Took a really big toll on me, especially when I was in high school. So, and I definitely went, uh, through a very deep depression, um, where, um, like I [00:23:00] was not doing very good and like, you know, and there was some substances I was using as like, it was just like to cope with things and it just didn’t, it was not the ideal situation for this immigrant child who.

Came to the states, you know, and, um, had with this big dreams, but I’m very, but with all that, I’m thankful to say that I always had, um, really great support system. Either it was with my friends, like coming to high school and like, you know, all that. So I, I was very involved throughout high school. Like, you know, I, I need, I knew that, you know, I had to do extra hard.

I needed to do, go, uh, Do things, get involved as much as possible and get great good grades and like, you know, that mindset of like, okay, I need to do something for my family because I’m the first one, uh, to go into of going off to college and doing all this. So there, so it was, it was a lot of challenges that way, you know, and.

just like participating in school. Like I would dance [00:24:00] in the morning at like, you know, practice from like 6:00 AM I had to find a ride way to school at 6:00 AM like, you know, to my uncle who would go to work at 4:00 AM So like he would drop me off my, uh, off to my cousin who lived to my, who lived by school and had to walk from there at my practice.

Um, Like from taking a 30, 40 minute nap and like after that out of theater practice at night until like 6:00 PM and then get a, a transportation, like the public ride back home and make sure like, you know, I cook food from my family before they get home, um, at, before they get home from work. So it was just, Of it was a way like, you know, it was a very crazy, crazy way, but I feel very, um, I feel stable with where I am right now and like I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without those experience that I had to go through.

Um, Though I do not wish all this to anyone, but you know, it, I, I do wanna say like it will get better once you come to the term to accept for who you are and like, you know, [00:25:00] acknowledging that your weakness is, but also knowing that you know it’s okay and it’s okay to be this and be. . So yeah, that was really something.

And just coming, having a family who really does support you and even though they don’t underst like they don’t understand, they will try to listen to you and, you know, try to get you. So that was something that I’m really grateful for, for, and yeah. I’m sorry I, that took a little too long. . No worries.

Thank you. Thank you so much for sharing all. Um, I came to us in 2012 and before. Coming to here, uh, you know, Martin Luther King Jr. Was my hero. And I thought, like when, you know, reading his biography, his work, I thought, you know, the, uh, the history around, um, uh, racism, um, kind of, um, had [00:26:00] already. Uh, because of Martin Luther King.

That was my understanding. That was what I had heard. And, and when I came, um, like early 2012 when, when I started working in the grocery store, like, um, kind of most of the customers, uh, used to kind of like ask me where I’m. Like, uh, and being a, uh, the, the idea of identity, um, where I’m from has always been a big crisis in my life.

And I’m sure, um, you know, most of you had, um, if you remember growing up in the refugee camp, um, I’m sure most of you have similar experiences. Um, I wanted to, I’m curious like, you know, um, My observation, um, the early days of my, um, experience in this [00:27:00] country was, um, I didn’t know that this country is so black and white, like the Wrestl divide, um, the cancel between one race versus another race.

And then, and then I wasn’t aware of like, you know, Fall into the brown category and, and then there is this like, big question like, you know, where do we exist between this, uh, between black and white? Um, um, I’m kind of like curious about your own observation, um, when you look at the larger, uh, scenario of this country.

Um, did, did you have any. Observation around that on the,[00:28:00]

any one of you? Yeah. So, um, I normally encounters, um, scenarios where, I’ve been labeled as an Indian, you know, , so it’s very st stereotypical. It’s so unfortunate. Um, but mm-hmm. , the people in this country, they does not realize that the country is built on the base of immigrant blood. You know, so all America, it’s, it’s all a part of melting pot.

Whatever concept that we bring in, it’s. So the man founding pillar, right? The standing pillars of America is based on the immigration, right? It’s from immigrant. Mm-hmm. , no matter, like you are born here, but your, uh, ancestors are from somewhere else, you know, unless you are a Native American, then that’s a different case.

So it’s very unfortunate that the discrimination is still exist and people still [00:29:00] judge you. By your cover, you know, so yeah, I have, I have seen that so many time in, in workplace, in a school, in grocery, I mean, normally you get treated so differently, even if you were like a hoodie to a store and then you are like a different color, they instantly judge you right there and then, uh, even like a storekeeper or they’ll have ice on you no matter where you go around the store.

So I have faced that personally. So, yep.

Yeah. Um, yeah, go piggyback, uh, of what Chandra said. Like, I, so I work at Target, like in a retailer and stuff, so, and those things are very, um, common thing that I have to witness from lot of my white team members lot of the time, um, especially racially profiling, um, customers. It’s. and [00:30:00] like, not to give them excuse, like not to excuse their action.

Like a lot of the time it’s so for white. Um, from my experience, like I, I’ve been like, I was very, I, I got involved with white folks when I, when I first moved, I state it was just, um, for me to be comfortable in this, you know, to, to this new place. So I definitely switched my . Switch my, uh, what, I guess like culturally, I switched myself culturally when I first moved to the state, so I got to witness a lot of things I feel like from the both side and like, so, and, and those times where like I had to cut some people off from my life because I, I couldn’t, I just couldn’t, uh, accept a lot of the things that would, I, it was not something a lot of the time intentionally, it was just something that was engraved in their thing.

It, it’s like they wouldn’t even realize the impact they. , like with the words that they’re saying, like, um, just for example, a lot of [00:31:00] the time this, uh, the white folks in my, uh, work, uh, they will be watching people closely to the, uh, mostly like a lot of the time it’s always bipo people, you know? And it’s really frustrating to see that, um, See, see that, and because I do have friends who are, um, who are black, you know, we’re brown, who even Nepali friends who have a very darker tone than, um, than some of us, you know?

And like even my little sister, she has a way darker tone than, oh, than me or my little brother. So I think this, uh, this stereotypes and things that really does impact our everyday life and just like being, especially for me and my personal level, I. , like I try to connect with people through experience more than, um, the racial and geograph geographical, uh, place that we’re born in.

Because I feel like when, when I do that, I just find it hard for me, uh, for me to, uh, connect with people or, uh, you know, to find that. Feeling of home or like [00:32:00] finding that connection with people. Because when I think that way, it’s just like, oh, they’re not Nepali. You know, they wouldn’t, they will never understand me.

But I try to listen to other Bipo people, um, and their stories and try to like, you know, empower each other to, uh, what we can do, what, uh, like actions that we can take to do better. So I think, um, this, the, the racial. Tension bet, uh, in America? I don’t, it has been better, I feel like, from when I, when I first came, but I don’t think it’s gonna go anywhere anytime soon.

But I feel like this collective, uh, like, you know, learning of each other’s culture and like learning and just respecting, um, respecting each other is gonna help us move forward. I feel like.

Thank you Noel and Sandra for sharing. You are listening to Apex Express and K P 4 94 [00:33:00] 0.1. 89.3 KP fp and online at kpfa Doz. Stay tuned in for more about Arrows Scam for Immers Leaders Reflection.

Ka Uh, how about, um, I. I mean, three of you are part of, were part of the Arrows Youth Leadership Camp, uh, 2022 cohort. Um, Kamara, do you wanna kind share with us, uh, your intention to join Arrows Youth Leadership Camp and share some of your experiences being part of the leadership camp? Absolutely. So going back to.

Last question. So for racism, I feel like I really, really struggled to find my community within the school because I never felt like I was a part of one of them. I try to find friends, I try to make friends. I’m like really outgoing. But neither with the teachers [00:34:00] or the students. Did I ever get the opportunity to connect?

And you think like, I went here from fifth grade, so it would’ve been easier to integrate into the culture and stuff, but I never felt like I belong there. And even now, I. Do go to high school, but I do Don normal, so I try to like be out of the high school as much as I can because some of my hardest struggles I feel like, have been inside those school walls because even talking to teachers, I never felt like heard or felt recognized instead of, I always felt like I was like undermined, and so I reached out from my community outside of the school walls.

So I really, really tried to. A part of the Nepali community as much as I could, like speaking, Nepali, being, seeing someone who was Nepali in the halls, that would always brighten up my day because it felt like that’s a part of my identity. So, uh, I joined a r u with the intention to meet new people [00:35:00] that were from the same background that I was, because that’s what makes me feel valid.

And I was really interested in the leadership camp because I wanted to grow. I wanted to learn about myself, and I was already doing some stuff in the community for my community, but I also wanted to learn more. I wanted to mentors. I wanted to be inspired. And I think after going to the camp, that’s exactly what a R u did for me.

It helped me re. The problems that we have in our society and how I can not only just acknowledge it, but become a part of the solution.

Thank you Pamela, for sharing. How about what was your intention and um, can you please share, share some of the experiences being part of the nuclear?[00:36:00]

Sorry, I can go . I can go. Um, first, um, like, yeah, so my in first intention, uh, was. To, uh, reconnect with my roots and, um, to my, to the, uh, to Bhutanese community. Um, like I had mentioned earlier, I, after I moved to this stage, just, um, because of my sexuality, one of the big reason was my sexuality. That really made me very, uh, distant from my community.

So, I just completely shot myself from going to Nepal events. Like, you know, hey, like just even reaching out to like Nepali friends or like, even I moved to the States, I had no connection with my Nepal, like friends from Nepal or like friends that had moved to the States with like before I did. You know, like I used to reconnect with them, uh, in the beginning of the years when I first moved in.

Um, and like after realizing that my, uh, about my sexuality and I just completely shut [00:37:00] that off. Like after that it was just me and American friends, you know? And like that’s, I lived my life that way. Um, I lived as like the, uh, quote unquote American teen li um, teens life, uh, when I was, um, when I was in high school.

Uh, even. In college, like beginning of college. And not until like, you know, recent, really recently, 20 20, 20 19, um, being in college, that kind of really made me realize, what, what do I really want to do with life? And like, you know, uh, what, what am I gonna do and who I am? Those questions started popping off and one of the main reasons a lot of this stuff also happened because of like a lot of those.

Activism that was arising against, um, black Li against the police brutality and the, the unfair treatment of black, uh, black individuals by the law enforcement. And with Black Lives Matter moment rising up and with Covid, with a, [00:38:00] like the Asian hate, all those stuff really put me in this place to like, make me think about like my whole life, you know, and where do I, where do I come from, who I am and.

like at, at that point I had, uh, my family had knew who I was and like, you know, I was being more comfortable of being myself and having conversation with my families about just our histories and all those stuff. So, and then Aru came in, uh, which I knew for a long time, but this year I. My uncle sent me an email, uh, messaged me and was like, Hey, said, sent, like, do this.

And I was like, oh my God. Yeah. And then I looked up and it was just exactly what I needed at the right, like, you know, the, the perfect time timing because I had opportunity, uh, before, but my mindset was not there to do those kind of activism, like, um, and I always did have that place for it. But this, um, and just having this experience this year, just.

Totally [00:39:00] like it changed me in a way, like, you know, it, it made me see my community, uh, from the side that I have never seen, like, you know, the side of, like, especially with the hi, like the, the traumas that my community had to deal with because of the displacement from Bhutan and moving to the states and I, I really just started, started dissecting myself.

History and like, you know, how it’s impacting me and my family and like my community. So that was definitely one of the main reasons I wanted to join, um, to learn about myself, you know, because I had questions, um, of why I am and I still do so. But I think, um, since I started wor uh, being part of aru, I, a lot of this.

Questions are being answered for me and I, I, yeah, that, and I hope that we can keep working, um, working with, I, I hope to keep working with Arrow in Future and have, uh, make [00:40:00] someone like, who felt like you know me, who feels like me in future, to make them feel connected to our community for our future generation.

So that’s really something that I am very grateful for, aro, for making me, bringing me back to. To my community, you know, to bringing back to my home, I would say. Thank you. Thank you. Sandra, how about you? Do you wanna share? Yeah, so, uh, For me, I think I like wanted to really my leadership life, you know, cuz uh, in the past I have attended a few leadership camp and I have been mentor of leadership camp and, um, and I was missing that experience.

You know, it, it went a long time. The first camp that I did was back in 2011 as a student. It was a migrant leadership camp in Pennsylvania. Right. It was a six day camp. Which happened in [00:41:00] Millersville University on Lancaster. Um, so yeah, I was missing those experience and I just wanted to make a new connection and then see, um, like what problems that our community are facing, what I can do maybe, you know, try to embol in it.

Uh, it particular like triggered me from after the, the, the, the pandemic hit cuz. Most of us were literally living in case, right? Where like I isolated for like, uh, two years. And then normally somebody recommended, I mean, to the camp, uh, , it’s like, why don’t you join the camp? And I was like, okay. So I’ve been in case for a long time, I have not make an interaction like social interaction with people and just wanted to make a new connection and see how I can blend into the.

Community, you know, as a new identity cuz uh, I didn’t have the, uh, my spiritual identity [00:42:00] in past when I used to did, uh, when I did those kind of a camp. And then I was just wondering, like, I was just testing myself. Will I be able to fit in because, uh, people normally kind of, you know, criticize you’re looking.

Your face joing, like, what are you doing? What, what are you wearing that aren’t you missing your life being spiritual or like trying to be religious? So I just wanted to taste that on myself. So that’s the initial reason to join the camp. Then I was very glad that it did meet my expectations and camp people were very nice and a friendly, they gave my space.

So yeah, I was very happy about it and I did make a, uh, lifelong connection. In the camp. So it’s really good and I’m very happy about it. Thank you. I’m, I’m also very happy that you all joined our leader camp. Um, [00:43:00] I know, uh, by the, uh, middle of the leadership training program, we divided, um, the participants into three groups.

Um, Storytelling group, mental health group and education group. Can you tell us more about your group and the, um, issues that your group is trying to address? Kana, do you, do you wanna begin? Sure. I could start us off. So for me, I, we were able to pick the groups that we pro. Prioritize. And for me, education was really on the top because for me, I always felt that there was a barrier between my parents and I.

And although they’re so, so supportive and they’re just amazing with that, they are illiterate. And my father was the oldest of his family, and my mother was also the eldest of her family. [00:44:00] So neither of them got to attend school at. So for me, I also felt like education was a barrier, which is why I, I wanted to explore a little more into that disparity.

And after, um, talking to our previous mentors that have gone through this camp program before, they identified that there was a large group of high school dropout rates in Harrisburg. So after that, we, um, spent some time. Trying to do surveys and stuff so we could see exactly what was the problem.

Because after conversations with the leaders in Harrisburg, also, we discovered that like they knew that this was a evident problem and stuff like that, but they weren’t aware of why. So we were like, why not start at the population that’s impacted the most? Right. So we started with the high school kids and.

We launched a survey, the results told us back that yes, this was an issue, [00:45:00] and that there was things that, hello?

Go ahead. Go ahead. Oh, I’m so sorry. So, We found out that like the issues were prominent in high school and we’ve mainly focused on launching it in the summer, so we had a little bit difficulties getting enough participants, but at the end we did get like a good amount and we found out that it was because of finance stuff, because they weren’t able to get resources that they need and our team and a R.

Joined together to now open a resource center in Harrisburg, which I think is so inspiring. I’m so ready for the next step.

Great. Thank you. Thank you Kana for sharing. Um, Chandra, do you wanna [00:46:00] talk about the mental health group? Yes. So, um, I was part of Mental Health Group and as you know, Our people have been, have been through like a lot of difficulties in their life from like flooding, from country, uh, and then spending their life as a refusing.

And then after that they had to overcome another hurdle moving to the, moving to the new country, which they have never thought up, where it does not match their religion culture. So it’s totally different, right? And then there has been a lot of trauma, people who are torture and they have like lots of thing going on and does not matter, like whichever is there, right?

So, so mental, mental health was one of the use issue. And normally in community there is a huge tabby about it. Like [00:47:00] people doesn’t know, like how to acknowledge it or they don’t think it exists. And, um, that’s really concerning and it’s, it’s hurting people day by day internally, but they does not realize that it’s been harming them.

So we just wanted to rate some awareness regarding that. So, um, so in past sessions in our leadership camp, we tend to focus on mainly the youth section, the teenagers. So, We decided to do a small research based on the substance substances abuse with the teen. Um, so what, what, what is causing them to have such a problem?

And for me, the reason behind me joining in mental group, mental health group was that. I believe like the spiritual healing could be also the one of the potential solution to overcome that issue. [00:48:00] So I thought, why not? Maybe I can repeat some spiritual idea and maybe they’re gonna help. So that’s the initial reason I wanted to be the part of it.

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you, Sandra. Now do you, do you wanna respond to that? Can you respond? I mean, can you say the question one more time? Yeah. So, um, during the youth leadership training program, we divided the participants into three groups, right? Mental health group, right. And education group and new, uh, were interested in the storytelling group.

So, uh, can you tell us, um, more about the storytelling group? What you all are doing, what, uh, kind of, uh, community issues that the his storytelling group is, uh, trying to address. [00:49:00] Yeah, so there’s two different, uh, storytelling groups, but the one that, um, that we’re constant, constantly working toward right now is our performance, um, performance piece that is focused on, um, our personal story.

And the reason I was, uh, interested in storytelling was because I feel that, um, Coming to Iowa, you know, and like, just realizing that learning so much his, like, so much thing about other people’s history. Like, you know, obviously it’s empowering, um, but at the same, at the same time, it makes you question, right?

Like, you know, what about my story? And like that, that may be a little selfish take on it, but at the same time, espe, you know, with just the treatment of, um, Bhutanese people from the Bhutanese, uh, the Vietnamese monarchy and just. Just the way that the political scene played out is just so unjust to, um, our people.

And there’s still, uh, [00:50:00] uh, political prisoners that are still in Bhutan that are serving, uh, their jail time who were just trying to fight for their right to live in the land that they had been living for a long time. And I see nothing wrong with that, and I. The stories and, uh, you know, the struggle of my community, of my family that, uh, the journey that they had to take is worth of, um, worth of being like, you know, those stories are worth of being told, worth of being heard.

Um, and it is. I, I like talking about life. I like talking about, um, learning about other people’s stories, learning, uh, sharing my own stories. Um, so that was one of the main reason, uh, I wanted to do that. Um, plus I do have like a little bit of, uh, performance, back background with Dune Theater back in camp, so that was definitely something that I did.

And like right now we are, um, so this, over this camp, um, [00:51:00] this summer we all came up with our own, you know, experience, uh, living. being an immigrant, being a refugee, and like, you know, uh, like how that has impacted us. And we all came up with a collective, a collective, uh, script of, um, after writing our own personal stories.

So right now we’re, we’ve been meeting like, you know, every, every month, once a month this year after the, uh, after summer. But next, once, uh, 2023 starts, we’ll be working like twice a month to, you know, really. Um, clean our performance and like clean the stories that we’re trying to sell, like, you know, um, so, and we’ll be performing that in San Francisco this summer in Bay Area, um, which I’m really excited about, uh, because we’ll be able to share this performance, uh, to other communities, uh, who can, who may relate to us, you know, who may feel heard and seen through our performance.

Uh, so yeah, I’m just really excited to represent our, um, our community in, [00:52:00] in that respect. So,

Great. Great. Yeah. Um, the, the name of the performance, uh, is called Mero Marietta. Right. And, um, Mero Literal, uh, translation would be my song, my Journey, and. And we look forward to perform at, uh, Y V C A in San Francisco, which is going to be exciting. Um, thank you. Thank you all of you for, uh, sharing, uh, your life journey, your experiences in the physic camps in US, and, uh, your experiences, um, being part of the youth leadership camp.

Um, before we close out, uh, do you wanna share any final.

After attending the leadership camp Camp, I felt like so heard, so [00:53:00] validated, and I honestly think that if there’s any other Bhutanese refugee youth out there, I definitely recommend a U’S leadership camp because it is a safe space for us all and I think that we would always appreciate new bonds, new connect.

Thank you Pamela. Any final thoughts?

Yeah. Uh, so like to appreciate you for hosting us today and also wanted to specially thanks Apex Express for giving us wonderful opportunity to share our experience Ke. And as equine kaa, I would definitely all the youth out there to come out and then at least play some role in, um, uplifting this organization and as young as you can also build some skills and grow along with the organization.

So like to invite every single [00:54:00] one out there was listening to us definitely should come out and try this leadership camp experience in long lot from it. Thank you so much. Thank you. No. Any final thoughts? Yeah. Um, not like, um, I, my final thought would be, um, just take your journey like, you know, one by one and not to, uh, not to sound like I’m giving advice or anything, cuz I, I’m still like myself growing and going through this journey, uh, trying to navigate my own self and trying to find myself.

So I think. , just be patient with yourself, especially if you’re someone listening who is a child epidemic comes from of experience that we have lived. I just wanna say that, you know, take your time, trust your process. Um, it’s okay to be easy on yourself. It’s okay to, um, [00:55:00] feel like that you don’t belong because, um, that’s such a suck, a sucky feeling, but.

Part of this journey and

uh, I think we lost normal. Um, alright, so, uh, it’s time to close, uh, for tonight. Thank you all for joining. Uh, thank you for such a rich conversation. Uh, please check out our website, kzla program. App Express to find out more about this show tonight and to find out how you can take direct action. We thank all of you listeners out there.

If resisting, keep organizing, keep creating, and sharing your reasons with the world. Your voices are very important. Netflix [00:56:00] Express is produced by Mi Lee, Jalina, Kimley, and ung, and. By Ryon. Tonight’s episode was hosted by Robin Goong and Is United. Thank you so much to the K P F A staff for their support.

Have a great night. Thank you.

[00:57:00] [00:58:00]

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